I recently completed reading Long Walk to Freedom: The Autobiography of Nelson Mandela. It took many late nights/early mornings to finally finish reading the book.

One time, I took the book along with my other academic readings to the library for a serious study session. The plan was to read my academic stuff and when I got bored with those, I’ll read the “leisure” book. But I made the mistake of reading the “leisure” book first, and I couldn’t put the book down and spent 2 hours reading about the life of Nelson Mandela.

Reading this “leisure” book turned out to require more of my mental capacity than my academic readings. As I read the book, I often stopped and pondered about the issues that Malaysians are facing in Malaysia. I’m not saying that there’s apartheid in Malaysia, but Mandela talked about justice, freedom, good/bad governance, democracy, sacrifice, human nature, politics….and all these things are very relevant to what’s going on in Malaysia.

Mandela talked about marches and rallies that Africans had to demand for freedom and equal rights, but the white government came down really hard on people who were involved in these “demonstrations”. And all marches and rallies became illegal. It was only when the ruling white government was almost ready for true democracy, that Africans could march in the streets without being harassed and assaulted.

I see the same thing happening in Malaysia. Even a peaceful walk to celebrate the International Human Rights Day was prohibited.

Mandela talked about about the many disagreements and quarrels that went on in his party, and the disagreements and quarrels that went on with other African political parties. There were always talks to try to resolve issues, give-and-take, and sometimes things were not resolved. And finally when the Africans were at the edge of freedom, the fights and quarrels were at their worst, and he realized that the saying that it’s always the darkest just before dawn was true.

Reading this made me realize one thing: the local newspapers like to emphasize the disagreements that DAP, PAS, and PKR have with each other, and play up the issue of disharmony. But from the way I see it — these disagreements show that these parties are equals. There’s room for discussions and disagreements. I think we really should be worried when there’s only one or two people who are speaking and the rest are silent in “agreement”.

Towards the end of the book, Mandela wrote about Mr. de Klerk claiming to not know that his government was funding covert organizations that committed violence against Africans. Mandela stated that “if a man in his position doesn’t know about such things, then he is not fit to be the head of the government.”

And that got me thinking about my own head of government who didn’t know that 40,000 Malaysian-Indian children did not have birth certificates. Maybe this is a small non-issue for him, but think about the 40,000 kids that lost their birth rights as Malaysians. Of course, the government is now doing something to help these kids regain what was denied of them, but that’s because it’s election time.

Vote for a Change!

Don’t exchange your civil and human rights for the promise of a street light outside your house.

The Election Commission (SPR) made a big deal that full time students overseas are eligible to vote as absent voters. But they sure don’t make it easy for students overseas to participate in the coming general election.

Even though I’m a registered voter in Malaysia, I know full well that the SPR is not going to search me out and send me the ballots. Surely, there’s a long and convoluted process to go through.

I did a search and couldn’t find anything regarding the postal voting process. The SPR website provides little information. So I emailed the director of the Malaysian Students Department at the Malaysian Embassy in Washington DC on February 13 and no reply till today. I then emailed the Malaysian Consulate in New York on February 20 and I’m amazed that someone actually responded to my email. But I was told to contact info@spr.gov.my. I did just that and the email bounced back because that email address had “permanent fatal errors”. I then looked for the Penang representatives at the SPR and emailed him, but I received another “permanent fatal errors” response.

Should I give up now?

Finally, a friend led me to this site that says that Malaysian students overseas can vote: I would have to go to the Consulate to fill up a Borang A in the presence of a Consulate staff and then send the form to SPR in Malaysia. And one week before the election date, the Consulate is supposed to receive an electoral roll of eligible absent voters and if my name is on that, then I will be able to vote.

Today is February 22, 2008. One week before the election date would be around March 1 or 2. So I have approximately one week to rush to the Consulate, fill up the form and then send the form back to Malaysia, and then the SPR staff will burn their midnight oil to enter my information into the postal vote list, and finally on March 1, my name will be on the postal vote list.

Hmmm…what are the chances of that happening?

I can definitely rush to the Consulate tomorrow. I can even pos-laju (or FedEx) my form back to Malaysia. But I doubt anyone at SPR will even look at my borang A for the next 6 months, let alone in the next few days.

I can only blame myself for not doing this earlier. I should have submitted the form like 3 months ago!
3 months? Who am I kidding?
4 months? Still not enough time.
5 months? Still a bit risky.
6 months? Yeah, I think 6 months should be sufficient.

I should have submitted the Borang A 6 months ago!!

I’ve resigned to the fact that I’ll not be able to vote during this general election…sigh…

One fine day, I hope to be able to meet a Malaysian full-time student overseas who managed to vote via postal vote. They are definitely a rare species. Maybe they can describe the postal vote process to me. I would like to know (a) the time needed to register to be an absent voter, (b) how they received the ballot, (c) how they sent it back, and (d) how tamper-proof was the envelope?

The university library has quite a large online collection of academic journals. But there are quite a number of journals that are still paper-hard-copy only. I used to have to go to the library, find the journal, spent money ($0.10 per copy) to photocopy the articles in those journals. But the student senate fought for free photocopying of these paper-only journals on the premise that — if students can print out electronic journal articles for free, why should the students have to spent money to get copies of articles in paper-only journals? And the students won. The library handed out photocopy cards to graduate students for a few months but they noticed that some students used the card to photocopy other stuff too. So they stop handing out the photocopy cards. Now there’s a link on the library website and students can request for photocopy of articles, and library staff will find the article in the paper-only journal, make a copy of it and then send the pdf file to the student. This is way better and saves me a lot of work. I can request 20 different journal articles and I’ll get the files the next day.

Anyway, the library employs work study students to do the photocopying. And this is a sample of a “fine” photocopying work. It always freaks me out when I have to read pages with images of thumbs and fingers attached. Not the hilariously freaky, more like the “ewwww” freaky!

May everyone’s year be prosperous and bountiful, just like this ball of a hamster.

But remember to do some aerobic exercise,

and some strength training.

Gong Xi! Gong Xi!

Dr. King’s vision of service beyond self -

From The Drum Major Instinct sermon delivered at Ebenezer Baptist Church on February 4, 1968

If you want to be important—wonderful. If you want to be recognized—wonderful. If you want to be great—wonderful. But recognize that he who is greatest among you shall be your servant. That’s a new definition of greatness.

And this morning, the thing that I like about it: by giving that definition of greatness, it means that everybody can be great, because everybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve. You don’t have to know about Plato and Aristotle to serve. You don’t have to know Einstein’s theory of relativity to serve. You don’t have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love. And you can be that servant.

These were the exact words on a small pledge card that came together with the MLK Day celebration pack. I thought the words were very powerful. When I was preparing to post this, I looked up the full sermon and realized that my very liberal university left out a lot. Go here for the full sermon.

I signed up for a 4-hour Resisting Racism workshop that was part of the Martin Luther King (MLK) Day celebration held at Lehigh. About 30 students attended. Half of the students were graduate students and the other half were undergraduate students. Majority of the undergraduate students who attended were black and the majority of the graduate students were white and almost all the graduate students were from the college of education. I’m surprised, and at the same time not surprised, by the turnout (the low number of students and demographics of the students).

The speaker, Ewuare X. Osayande, went through the history of race and racism in the US. Here are some highlights from the workshop:

1. Race is a social construct. There is no biological determination for race.

2. I hate the word tolerance. Moving beyond tolerance towards true appreciation. (I totally agree with him. If someone says that s/he has tolerance towards me, it is like s/he is trying really hard to keep me in his/her system and not throw up. So whenever I read about some local politicians encouraging tolerance in our society: Is everyone green in their face trying to not throw up?)

3. European men in the 1600s created the language to classify people.

4. In 1775, a German, Johann Blumenbach, said that the human species has 5 races: Caucasian, Mongolian, Malayan, Negroid and American. And of course, Blumenbach said that the Caucasian race is the superior race because the Caucasian skull is the most aesthetically appealing.

5. David Hume, the prominent Scottish philosopher said this:
“I am apt to suspect the negroes and in general all the other species of men (for there are four or five different kinds) to be naturally inferior to the whites. There never was a civilized nation of any other complexion than white, nor even any individual eminent either in action or speculation. No ingenious manufactures amongst them, no arts, no sciences.”

6. Racism: oppression as a result of race.

7. 1619. The first shipment of African slaves to Virginia (early US). The African slaves were called “negars” and were considered capitals which can be traded for goods and services.

8. 1640. Three indentured servants (i.e., laborers under contract: 1 Scot, 1 Dutch, 1 African) tried to escape. They were caught. The Scot and Dutch were sentenced to 4 more years of service. The African was sentenced to serve the rest of his natural life. Being “white” means less punishment.

9. 1691. “White” became a legal definition. Whatsoever white man or woman shall intermarry with a Negro shall be banish within 3 months from the dominion (colony in the early US). Whiteness has status and social value.

10. 1705. Inheritance law: All negros, mulattos, and indian slaves within this dominion shall be held as REAL ESTATE and shall descend unto heirs and widows according to the custom of land inheritance.

11. 1790. Naturalization laws: Only free white people can become citizens.

12. 1848 in the state of Georgia. Punishment for teaching slaves or free persons of color to read: If any slave, Negro, or free person of color, or any white person, shall teach any other slave, Negro, or free person of color, to read or write either written or printed characters, the said free person of color or slave shall be punished by fine and whipping, or fine or whipping, at the discretion of the court (If a person of color taught a student of color, both will be punished. If a white person taught a student of color, only the student of color will be punished).

13. 1865. Thirteenth amendment to the US Constitution: Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime where of the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction. (The speaker said that in 1865 slavery was abolished, except as a punishment for crimes. He added that at the height of slavery, there were about 4 million slaves in the South. He then said that an estimated 3 million blacks have been imprisoned in the US. He emphasized the irony of that situation).

14. 1866. A judge said: A black man has no rights which a white man is bound to respect.

15. 1970s. Affirmative action: Affirmative action policy was made during Nixon’s presidency. It promoted a small group of people with privilege so that they can suppress the others (Hmmm…this sounds very familiar).

16. The effect of whiteness is status. It disconnects you with humanity.

17. The privilege of whiteness means the suffering and oppression for those who are not “white” (I would add the privilege of any color or race…).

18. Racism did not begin in a day. The answer would involve struggle, both personal and organizational.

COE had another day of service last Friday. This time, I went to volunteer at a day care center for low-income families. As usual, I became the unofficial photographer of the event. The camera was a great ice-breaker because the kids loved having their pictures taken. I was assigned to a class of 4-5-year-old kids. It was fun playing with the kids and observing the kiddy conflicts and tattle-tales.

I took this video during the Casting Crowns concert. Originally, I did not post this on youtube. But when I revisited this video later on, I thought it would be a waste if I did not share it. So I posted it on youtube and it generated 3000 hits in 4 hours! Quite unbelievable.

While I was decluttering I came across my old journal which documented my journey towards graduate school in the US:

March 13, 2000

I have this plan to further study in the US, somewhere in the east coast…. Well, it is just a plan. Still a very long way to go, no finances or offer. I wonder if it will really come true.

February 14, 2003

Valentine’s day and I was at home waiting for a long distance phone call from the US. The call came at 10:30pm and from then on, it was 25 minutes of stumbling and ah-eh-ah-eh. I’m so glad that is over. The people at Lehigh seemed interested in me, in their words “impressed with your credentials.” They pretty much accepted me (if I read in between the lines correctly) and even sort of promised me funding. Now all I have to do is wait for the official offer and then I can do some major celebrating. But before that comes, I’d better not jump off any cliffs.

March 19, 2003

Getting the experience and the degree in the US comes with a high price. Once upon a time when it wasn’t a reality, it didn’t seem so hefty. But now that it is almost at hand, I do doubt whether it is worth it….the years spent away from home, family, loved ones. Maybe if I was 18 or 19 or 20, it wouldn’t seem like such a big deal. But at 28, it just seems so BIG because not many of my friends with my background are making moves this big.

Maybe it is the great adventure. The homesickness would be massive and there will be no instant cure.

May 25, 2003

I think Lehigh is an open door but I cannot say for sure that this is God’s will for me. But the way the doors have opened, even though sometimes I feel I have blown it, just points to divine intervention. And now that Chris and Ivan will be picking me up from Newark and the Malaysian students have opened their home to me for temporary housing and all, I can’t help but know that Someone is looking out for me. Besides, I don’t know why I chose and applied to Lehigh. I just wanted somewhere that is not too competitive. And Lehigh ended up being the only one that offered financial aid.

I took a class on Diversity and Multiculturalism three years ago. In the class, the students were divided into several diversity topics: Race, Ethnicity, Gender, Sexuality, Social Class, and so on. And I was assigned to the Race group. Some of the assignments for the class were:
1) An Otherness experience: Attend an event where I am the “other” person and then write a report on it. For example, a White person can attend a Black church, or a Middle Class person can visit a homeless shelter. As for me, I thought this assignment is redundant, since I experience otherness every single day in the US.
2) A journal of my thoughts regarding my assigned topic (Race). Sort of a contrast between “before-taking-the-class” and “after-taking-the-class” to document any changes in my thoughts and opinions on the issue of Race. I really enjoyed writing that paper: it’s almost like at last I have been given a valid outlet to express my thoughts on this oh-so-sensitive issue. Here is an excerpt from my 6-page (double-space) paper. Keep in mind that I wrote this for an American professor who may not even know where Malaysia is, so instead of going into details about the conflicts, I have simplified some issues.

============================

The Malay-Chinese Model and the Third Race

Elizabeth Martinez’s article talks about racism in the United States being a Black-White model, racism in Malaysia has often times being seen as a Malay-Chinese model. In the battle between the Malay majority and the Chinese minority to gain control, one minority race, the Indians, the third race has been marginalized. The Malaysian government in their quest to make education seem more equal has implemented a new “meritocracy” plan for university admissions. Since the Malays and non-Malays take separate university entrance examinations, I am skeptical that admission is truly based on merit. With the implementation of the new merit system, last year’s university admission data showed that the Malays were still the dominant race entering universities, about 65%, while the Chinese maintained at 30%, but the Indians have dropped from 10% to 5%. Without the previous quota system, the new “meritocracy” has worked against the Indians. The Indian minority group has tried to ask the government to return to the previous quota system as many of their students were not able to gain admission into universities with this new system but the Malay-dominant government has make a decision that “meritocracy” is here to stay.

It is being said that it is the Indians who lost everything in this battle for equality. The new “meritocracy” system, which was meant to bring about some equality in education, has pushed the Indians almost out of the picture. I now see that while I have some Chinese privilege, the Indians have been the most oppressed group. Since the system has always been about taking care of our own, the current system will foster a greater divide among the three major races in Malaysia. As I have faced racism and thought of the many injustice that occur in my life, I understand now that other groups have suffered too and often times have scars worse than mine.

Am I a better person now?

All along I have focused on being the oppressed but now I see that I had allowed that to be my rationale to harbor prejudice against others. I am still very much against the sort of affirmative action that is being carried out in my country. I am beginning to see the effects of it not only on my life but also on the society as a whole. I still hate the term racial quota and I am against the new university entry system that creates a false sense of “meritocracy”. Affirmative action has caused great divide in my country. While Malaysia may be called a peaceful multicultural country, many Malaysians hold grudges against the privilege other, may it be the Malay-majority privilege or the Chinese-economic privilege. The poor and less privileged are being left further behind. The affirmative action has disunified my country. While I would like to deal with racism, I do not see how I can affect societal or institutional change. I can only try to work on it on a personal and emotional level. I would have to work towards not letting racism and oppression consume me with hatred. I would have to work towards not letting it make me think of only me and myself.